They say that most people’s weaknesses are their strengths used to excess. Someone who is loyal can also be stubborn, someone who is patient is a procrastinator, someone who is kind is taken advantage of. Sometimes our weaknesses are not the problems, but rather our strengths.
There are times when you are being you, and you being you is the best thing for the people around you and the situations you are in. And then all of a sudden, you being you makes things worse! One minute they love your new ideas, the next they get annoyed because you’re always changing stuff. One day they love that you are chatty and friendly, the next they are frustrated that there’s no peace and quiet in the office. One week they like it because you are productive and get stuff done, the next week they’re exhausted and grimace when you rally them to get more stuff done.
Jesus was sometimes his own worst enemy. In the gospel of Mark we read a story where Jesus has done too much good, and now things are falling apart. The emerging plot to kill Jesus (because of his provocative healings) by the Pharisees and King Herod’s men caused Jesus to flee the village and head to the lake to cool off. But, the crowds found him there, overwhelmed him, driving Jesus into a boat to avoid getting crushed. So many people had been healed, and so many more still needed it.
Imagine the chaos, the cries for help, the pleading and begging. And, on top of that, there were plenty of people with impure spirits falling down on the ground screaming out to Jesus in deranged voices, “You are the Son of God!” And Jesus is commanding them to shut up. Jesus being Jesus is seeming to make things worse.
Jesus can relate to your moments of self-frustration – when you being you seems to work for people one minute, and then the next you’re still being the same you but making things worse. Like Jesus, we are probably right that we need to pull away for a bit, figure out what’s going on, and what we’re doing to make things worse. But Jesus pulled away in order to get back into the fray. He withdrew in weakness to return strengthened.
Have you been in a place where you being you is making things worse? Sometimes personal success is our worst enemy. Sometimes lack of self-awareness harms us. Sometimes denial of our past hurts undermines the use of our strengths. Sometimes refusing to forgive turns our strengths into weaknesses. Sometimes lack of boundaries makes things worse.
We think of Jesus always being perfect, but he was fully human. Christmas reminds us of the radical way God wants to be present to people – he becomes like one of us so that we may become like him. What’s it mean to be like God? To love. Which is why Jesus always teaches us to forgive, because love covers over a multitude of wrongs. When you being you makes things worse, repent and forgive. When things get crazy, get away in order to come back stronger in love.
What do you need to do to withdraw, like Jesus? Be home alone? Get outdoors for a brisk walk? Go out to eat with a trusted friend? Journal? Sing? Cry? Play? Sleep? Pray? Count your blessings? Go to church? Volunteer in your community? Get counseling? Read a good book?
Take a break so that you can take stock of what you’re doing to make it worse and recalibrate your strengths so that you can be the loving, healing, stronger person God is helping you become.